Welcome to Tuesday's Blend! (If you've never participated in the Blend, click on the button below to start.)
If you haven't read yesterday's post yet, please check it out. I would love to hear from you. I am cookin' up some exciting things related to adoption so stay tuned! I have appreciated hearing your questions regarding adoption and do plan to address those soon.
On another note - I want to talk child rearing today!
dDo you ever feel overwhelmed?
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Discouraged?
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Like you can't handle another day with your child or children?
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I definitely have and it's not a good feeling at all.
dRecently I was feeling this way and was praying for wisdom and creativity. I'm learning that sometimes you just gotta shake things up. So I starting flipping through "Creative Correction" by Lisa Whelchel and I began to feel motivated.
Here are the 4 new ideas that I recently implemented:
A. The good behavior chart
I found this particular chart from a website I plan to visit again. Check out "Free Behavior Charts" here.It's always good to focus on the positive, right!? So when I "catch" my kids making positive choices they get to color a petal.
When I first introduced this to them last week, Paige was making lots of good choices and saying LOTS of nice things. Then she'd look at me with a bit of a mischievous smile and I'd say, "You want to color a petal don't you." "YEP!" was her enthusiastic reply!
I don't have them color a petal for every good choice but I find that they are very excited when they get to. When the entire page is colored I told them we'd do something special together...not sure what that will be yet, but we'll figure it out.
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B. The "Not So Good" Behavior Chart :)
(Click here for a better view of this chart.)
I have a chart for both girls - Hudson wouldn't get it yet...I don't think. The words at the top say, I will try my best to _____.
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All of my dear children have different "issues" that we are working on. I wrote a specific issue for each girl on the top.
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So when they disobey, I take a marker and turn a smiley face into a frown. (This idea I got from "Creative Correction.") If I have to turn all 6 faces to "frowny faces," there would be a bigger consequence like going to bed early or loss of some other privilege.
They really don't like getting "frowny faces" and (for the most part) they turn their attitude around. It has helped me from getting so frustrated too. I've been able (for the most part) to be more matter o' fact about their discipline - which is a good thing!
They really don't like getting "frowny faces" and (for the most part) they turn their attitude around. It has helped me from getting so frustrated too. I've been able (for the most part) to be more matter o' fact about their discipline - which is a good thing!
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C. Take a "GO"
I got this idea and the next one from Paige's kindergarten teacher. The kids helped me make the hand prints which was fun for them.
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When the kids are being disobedient in some way or even just too wild, they have to take a "GO" which means they walk over to the wall and put their hand on the green hand. Then they are free to go on with life!
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This one works great with Hudson too. It's more of a distraction and a reminder that their behavior is inappropriate and needs to be changed.
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If this doesn't help, I may have them do it again or send them to the STOP chair.
D. The "STOP" Chair
They have to sit here quietly but are allowed to read books. If they can't get it together (which never happens right?!) I may send them to the office where they are not allowed to read or play.
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So these are some new ideas I've been implementing in our home. It really has been making a difference. So we'll go with it until it stops being effective and then we'll move onto something new again!
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I would love to hear about what works in your home. I in no way feel like I've got this parenting thing down pat. I'm need His grace everyday to help me be a good mommy! I mess up a lot but I desire to grow.
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Getting a new idea or fresh perspective really helps me. I look forward to learning from you!
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Feel free to leave me a comment or if you would like to write your own post in regards to this, you can use Mr. Linky!
8 comments:
Great ideas Jami! Although i can see my kids thinking it was cool to put their hands on the hand;)
I will have to think if I have any to share.
Hi Jami! Thanks for checking on how things are going without the hubby. It was encouraging.
There are some really great ideas in this post! Hubby and I don't have kids yet, but I appreciate things like this for the future when we do.
Thanks for the great ideas Jami! I'm going to check out those charts and see if it will work with Noah yet. It's worth a try anyway, what do I have to lose? :) I also have very good intentions about the hands so I'm hoping to get that implemented soon. I think I need to buy that book, Creative Correction, that you keep talking about. :)
Great ideas! Thanks for sharing!
I'm with Mindy - I may just have to invest in the book. I've heard good things before about it!
We're just coming on a whole new world with Ava - so I'm tucking ideas in the back of my head (hoping they won't be lost forever!) : )
One idea I've heard that I plan to definately do with our kids when they are older, is that when whining becomes an issue, a chore is automatically assigned. I've heard of just having a list of "approved" extra chores (such as filling a grocery bag with weeds or cleaning a toilet). It kind of takes away the constant conversation about whining and just gives a direct consequence (and, dare I say, removes the whiner from your presence momentarily?!).
Now if I could only figure out a way to make it work for a 15 month old - is she too young to teach to clean a toilet?! : )
This is great Jami! I've been struggling with my 4 yr old lately. I have Lisa's book, and probably need to review it too! I'll check out those charts links!
I have this book. It's a great tool to use when you are not sure what to do. Or you are getting frustrated with what you usually do when they are misbehoving.
I love the little hand print idea...we kind of do this but without the hand. If the kiddos are acting up they have to go lay down in their room until they are feeling normal again and can come back down. I leave it up to them when they are ready to rejoin society. =O) Sometimes they just take a nap, Noah looks at books. The biggest thing I've done that seems to help a ton is to think through the "HALT" things that make anyone crazy if the kiddos are grumpy pants; are they hungry, angry, tired, or lonley. With kids, angry is a little vague, but it stands for the times that a toy was taken or some other misdead and they just need to be understood and told that they can have angry feelings but can't act on them. I run through the list myself to because sometimes the kids aren't being that terrible...I'm just hungry or need to deal with a feeling of anger over something in my personal quiet time.
Great ideas and I loved the pictures with the post or inspriation.
Ann
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