The other day I woke up with an absolutely wrong attitude. I wanted the day to be about me. That never works well but especially not when you have little kids to take care of.
I felt annoyed by every child who needed me. Oh I'm such a mess sometimes. I shooshed kids out the door and turned them back around when they made an appearance.
I was short with them. I felt like I was going to go crazy because they. were. always. right. there.
At one point, I was working around the house while a podcast was playing in the background. It was then that I heard his voice. Well actually it was His voice, He was speaking through the man on the radio who said this.
"Jesus was never in a hurry. His ministry was to the people right in front of him."
Instantly, I thought - oh that is a good blog post topic. And then it hit me like a ton of bricks, "Helloooo, Jami. This is not for other people, this is for you. You are pushing aside those that I have entrusted into your care. Your ministry is to those little children who are right in front of you."
I wish I could tell you, I woke up and allowed the Lord to change my attitude and behavior right then and there but I still struggled with grumpiness that day. But this thought, this concept has been on my mind a whole lot lately.
The Lord has given me six children right now to love on, cherish, teach and support. There are times where I can refresh and get away. Every day, the kids go down for quiet time for a good 2 hours. This is my time. Every Monday I have a sweet babysitter come for FOUR hours so I can get away and run errands, go to my girl's school, or just sit at Panera and write. Monday mornings are my time. Every other Tuesday night, Clint and I get a sitter so we can focus on each other and go on a date. That is our time.
It is absolutely wrong when I think that "my" time should extend all throughout the day. It is selfish and it is sin. I have been so convicted of this.
I have prayed before heading into the grocery store or out on an errand, "Lord, help me not to be too busy to be interrupted today." Honestly, it's easier to do this when I'm out and about but it's much harder to live this every day with my kids.
The more I stop and spend time each one of my children, look them in the eye, tease them, or speak truth into their souls, I am abundantly blessed. Conversely, when I have my mind on me, I am easily annoyed, crabby, and irritable. I don't want to live that way.
It's not about me. It's absolutely not about me. Lord help me to remember this and help me to live it!
7 comments:
Excellent post! Thank you!
I can relate to your podcast revelation. I'm always amazed at how the Lord chooses to communicate to me. Our church is currently covering the Seven Deadly Sins. Last Sunday the sermon was on Anger. In a nutshell the sermon talked about how/what to be angry about in a healthy way and how/what to be angry about in an unhealthy way. I have to say I initially felt this topic didn't apply to me much since I really don't consider myself an angry person. About a fourth way through the sermon I had an "ah-ha!" moment. It dawned on my that I had been struggling very recently with some significant anger towards someone very close to me and that this sermon was exactly what I needed from the Lord. It couldn't have been more timely. How amazing that the Lord knows exactly what each and every one of us needs and loves us so much like a parent guiding a child.
I've never commented, but I love reading your blog, and enjoy the wisdom you share. This post is no exception, and certainly one I needed to read today! Thank you.
Love this post. Such a great reminder- I struggle with it too!
This is EXACTLY how I felt yesterday...grumpy, then guilty, then even grumpier. [And I only have two little ones "following me" around the house.]
Thank you, Jami, for sharing your struggle and the Lord's encouragement to you. It certainly blessed me today!
-Michelle Parker
This was so me yesterday! I just couldn't stand being needed every.two.seconds. And we were about to celebrate the adoption of our twins (took place today).
I needed this post very much. Thank you for sharing. Thank you for being honest.
You are so right. When I want the day to be about me, it never works. But taking time to love and parent them always makes the day a great one.
Thanks for sharing this, Jami! Each and every day I yearn to have little ones running around in this house and every now and then someone will say, "Enjoy the quiet while it lasts." Right now the quiet is deafening and I pray to always be reminded of that when I yearn for quiet when my kids are finally home. I don't ever want to forget "this" feeling, for fear of taking the blessings for granted!
Love,
Christie
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