who is the underdog?

One of my most consistent prayers for our kids is that they will look out for the underdog. I pray this nearly everyday with the girls and for Hudson and D when they go to preschool as well.

The other day, I asked Paige to pray for D before his bus came to pick him up for school. After praying with him, she looked up at me and said, "Mom, I don't think D knows who the underdog is."


Her words took me back as I thought, he is the underdog.

Our little D has some speech and cognitive delays which made him eligible for a developmental preschool that he attends every morning. D has seen much more in his young life (more than I even know) than I'm sure I have seen in all my years. He has been shuffled around a lot in his first years - his start very rough and that has affected him on many different levels.

Sometimes, this fact makes my heart just break for him and I want to pull him into my arms and pour out my love onto him and yet, other times I feel very frustrated with him and struggle more to love him in the way he needs.

He is our biggest challenge right now. He is our neediest. He is an almost four year old that often acts more like a two year old and that makes things difficult. He is not potty trained. He is hard to understand and communicate with. I have seen improvement but there are many times that I give him instructions and he just shuts down and won't comply.

Over and over I question myself. Does he really understand what I'm asking? Is he getting it or is he just being stubborn? Is structure so foreign to him that he will fight it time and time again? I pray for the Lord to fill me with supernatural love for my little D because I simply don't always want to love him. I hate that, but it's true.

His need for me makes me run to my Savior because I cannot give him (or anyone else for that matter) what they need without first being filled by Jesus. When I am weak, He is strong. So I'm praying for my little D. Praying that he will become a man who cares deeply for the underdog. A man who is full of wisdom and integrity. A man who first and foremost loves Jesus with an infectious passion. My job is to introduce D to the One who can meet every single one of his needs, the One who can make him complete and whole. Help me Jesus.