Our little "L" has always been a daddy's girl. Due to reasons I won't go into here, she hasn't seen her daddy for several weeks. Normally she visits her parents once a week right after nap time. Lately, while putting her to nap or bed, she's been asking "See Daddy?"
I always have had to respond the same. "No honey, you're not going to see your daddy today." I've shared with her that Daddy is having some troubles and we should pray for him. We have discussed this more than a few times. The other night though, I had a heartbreaking conversation with our sweet girl.
For those of you who don't know, L is our 2 year old (almost 3) foster daughter. We have had her in our home for approx. one month.
After tucking L in for her nap and singing "Jesus loves me" with her (per our tradition), I stood up to leave. Blowing her a kiss I said, "Goodnight darling!" But she had more to say.
L - "See daddy?"
Me - "No sweet girl, you're not going to see daddy today."
L - "Daddy in trouble?"
Me - "Yeah, honey your daddy is having troubles but daddy loves you.
L - "Daddy loves me? Mommy loves me? Grandma loves me? (L lived with her grandma most of her life before coming here.
Me - "Yes, you're grandma's little girl!"
L - "My grandma. MINE." And then softly and sadly she said, "Miss her."
L again - "See daddy?"
Me - "No, honey."
L - "Daddy trouble? Daddy need help?"
Me - "Yeah, baby he needs help. We can pray for your daddy."
And we proceeded to pray for her daddy and mommy and the rest of her family (us included!)
As I got up to leave a second time, I kissed her sweet face and said "L, Mama Jami loves you so much."
This breaks my heart. No child should have to deal with these questions but there are hundreds of thousands of kids in the U.S. foster care system alone who will go to bed with similar questions on their hearts tonight. Many of them have no one to talk these things through with. There are children in your community tonight who are going to bed alone. Going to bed feeling lost and abandoned. You might be the person God wants to use to whisper His love into their ears. To kiss them on the face and tell them they are loved. You might be the one to be Jesus to the child who is lonely, hurting, and abandoned.
God calls us as Christians to be His Hands and Feet to the lonely, to the fatherless, to the brokenhearted. There is a huge need for loving (not perfect) but loving foster parents right her and now. Could you add a bed (or two!) to a bedroom in your house? Could you pull up another chair at your dinner table? Are you willing to step out if the Lord says "go?" I just have to ask. Will you prayerfully consider your role in helping the poor and needy? We all have a role to play. Just take the next step. This is why we're here.
"Feed the hungry and help those in trouble. Then your light will shine out from the darkness and the darkness around you will be as bright as noon. The Lord will guide you continually, giving you water when you are dry and restoring your strength. You will be like a well-watered garden, like an ever-flowing spring. Some of you will rebuild the deserted ruins of your cities. Then you will be known as a rebuilder of walls and a restorer of homes" Isaiah 58:10-11
12 comments:
made "the call" to baby fold on Friday, "the packet" should be here any day! Thanks for all your help!
Kirsten, Yaaaay! :) You know I'm here to support you in this! Love you!
Dear Jami, thank you so much for sharing. Just recently God's placed two "fatherless" boys just down the street from us. We've reached out to them at first because of some "attention getting, inappropriate" behavior but after listening to the loneliness and heartbreak in their voices we're trying to figure out what to do next. I was especially touched when I asked the 10 year old who his mother was and he said, "which one? my first Mom gave me up when I was 3 years old. I don't remember her name for sure but I still remember her face and now my second Mom doesn't want me either." After giving him a big hug I came in the house and cried out to God... and cried uncontrollably for several minutes...
... again Jami thanks for sharing. I'm not sure what God's asking us to do for sure but I know He's working. I've always loved the elderly "naturally" as a geriatric nurse so never considered myself a candidate to invest in children but we need to always be open to His guidance. Have a blessed day and please hug little "L" an extra time for me today. Love you in Christ, Elsie
Oh my, I cannot imagine.
You are the best Jami!
oh Elsie - I will be in prayer for you. Thanks for being willing to listen to the Sprit's leading even though it doesn't necessarily make sense to you. Will be praying for clear direction and strength.
Sarah - it is just heartbreaking isn't it?!
Gina - You always make me smile. I would love to get your email address! Send it to me via clintandjami@gmail.com if you want!
Gina - You always make me smile. I would love to get your email address! Send it to me via clintandjami@gmail.com if you want!
Jami,
I came to your site from Christi's and wanted to say, "Thank you" for posting this. My husband and I started the foster to adopt journey a year ago. We have just submitted our homestudy for a legal risk placement. We know that this road will be heartbreaking at times, but we also serve a sovereign God.
I look forward to following your journey and getting to know you better!
In Christ,
Christie
http://satisfactionthroughchrist.blogspot.com
so thankful i found your blog! our family is making room for foster children and just beginning this journey... we have felt the call for awhile now, but thought with 5 of our own children it just wasn't possible. but, it IS possible... and we're doing it (making room for 4 children)!! we're excited and nervous and thankful to hear of other families also answering the call! :)
I know this is an old post, but I just came across it today, and I truly felt that God led me right where I needed to be. After completing a blissful and "perfect" newborn adoption 3 years ago, we are having nothing but trouble and delays and ridiculousness with our adoption agency this second time around. We've been considering foster adoption, but are hesitant because of so many fears, so many "horror stories," and the like. Your post made me cry, and opened my heart to the tremendous need out there. We will pray more about this route and see what God has in store for us. Thank you for your touching words.
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